I’M HUNGRY
“I could eat the crotch out of a dead leper’s undies.”
“I could eat the horse and chase the jockey.”
“So hungry I’d eat a shit sandwich, only I don’t like bread.”
“I could eat the arse out of a rag doll through a cane chair.”
“So hungry I could eat the arse out of a low flying duck.” |
I’M THIRSTY
“I’m dry as a dead dingo’s donger.”
“I’m drier than a nun’s nasty.”
“I’m dry as a fuck with no foreplay.”
“I’m as dry as a pommie’s bath mat.”
“I’m as dry as a bull’s bum going up a hill backwards.”
“I’m drier than an Arab’s fart.” |
I NEED TO GO FOR A PEE
“Gonna drain me dragon.”
“My back teeth are floating.”
“Need to syphon the python.”
“Takin’ the kids to the pool.”
“I got to take a snake’s hiss.”
“Gotta go have a slash.”
“Gonna go water a horse.”
“I’m off to drain the main vein.”
“Time to splatter the bladder.”
“I’m dying for a piss so bad I can taste it.”
“Shake hands with the wife’s best friend.” |
I NEED TO DO A POO
“I gotta go give birth to a Kiwi.”
“I’m takin’ a stroll to the gravy bowl.”
“It was like giving birth to Kim Beasly.”
“Off to the bog to leave an offering.”
“Time to snap off a grogan.”
“Have to hang a brown bear in the porcelain cave.”
“I’m gonna strangle a brownie.”
“There’s a brown dog barking at the back door.”
“I’m going to give birth to your twin.”
“Need to choke a brown dog.”
“I’ve freed Nelson Mandela.”
“Going for a Rodney.”
“Taking out the garbage.”
“I gotta back one out.”
“Release the Chocolate hostage.”
“i gotta lay some cables for Telstra.” |
VOMIT
“Calling for George.”
“I was driving the porcelain bus this morning.”
“I left him a lawn pizza.”
“Toss a tiger on the carpet.” |
NO
“Pig’s arse!!”
“Get Fucked!” |
YES
“Does a fat dog fart?”
“Even Blind Freddy could see it.”
“Is the Pope a Catholic?”
“Does a Koala shit in a gum tree and wipe his ass on a Cockatoo?”
“Does the Pope tuck his shirt in with a wooden spoon?”
“Bloody oath!”
“No wucking furries.” |