Schmertzer’s Barty


Der Farmer’s Eight Hours

(Mit apologies.)

Ven der vheat vos in der schtook, und the rain vos threaten soon,
Und der night wos suiting grand, for some carting by der moon,
Ven der farmer tinks he’ll save, all his crop ven comes der morn,
He hears his vorkmen singing, in a vay dot sounds forlorn –

Ve haf vorked eight hours today
Farmer cart your own darn hay;
Ve don’d vill move a hand
To go oud on your land.
For ve couldn’t vork a half-a-minute long –!

Ven der cow vas getten bogged in der creek not far avay,
Und shoost a knock-off dime a neighbour calls to say,
Dot he‘d gif a hand to helup, uf der vorkmen on der fram,
Vould also gome und get der cow from oud by any harm –

But – ve’fe worked eight hours today
Und ve don’d got too much pay,
Let der cow got tead!
Vere der vords dey said –
For ve couldn’t vork a half-a-minute longer!

Ven der bush fire’s raging high around dot homestead farm,
Und der farmer from his home vos filled mit alarm,
Ven he goes to ox his ploughman or der poy dot vos schtart –

Ve haf worked eight hours today,
Let der fire shoost blaze avay –
Ve couldn’t schange our mind,
So tink us not unkind –
But ve couldn’t vork a half-a-minute longer.

Ven der shoost vos gomen, in der schun der poy vos turn,
Und der clock vos schtrike der hour – den der farmer he vould learn,
Dot der handle goes no more around, der poy vos left und gone
Und der air vos filling mit der vords of dis old silly song –

I haf worked eight hours today,
Let der cream till der morning schtay –
Id’s a sorrowful job,
But, so help me bob –
I couldn’t vork a half-a-minute longer.

Dee man schtarts off mit a load of schaff, packed tightly on der dary,
I schmile me at vot he did cos he’d vorked eight hours dot day;
But in der schtreet, a hundred yards fon der schtore he schtarted for
He took oud der horse und sat on der curb – he don’d could do no more.

For I’fe vorked eight hours today,
Hang der boss’s moke und dray –
Let der beeples laugh,
At dot load of schaff
But I couldn’t vork a half-a-minute longer!