Braat Wurst




Schmertzer’s Barty

Schmertzer had a daughter dot shoost vos dwenty-von,
Und so he gate a barty so all could haf some fun;
He sent oud inwitations to all dose beeples round,
‘Und a finer lot of Schermans don’d novhere could be found.

Der vos derder Rienkies und der Specs, der Kriebkes fon der blain,
Der Kaysers, Rumfs, und Blitzkens ve meet some more again;
Der Scheinloofs all vos dere, mine Fritz, also mine frau,
But der old Schmertzer mit his flute, vos make der mostest row.

Ve voltzed around his lofely barn, und did dor skvare dance too,
Und der pastor he vos sing. ” Und schtill his viskers grew.”
I danced dot Irish ”proke me down”—I don’d do id pooty veil,
Id proke me down, dot’s right genuf—”I like a soldier fell.”

Der younger beeples kept it oop undil der “un vos rise,
I close oop vos aschleep, I don’d could voke mine eyes:
But ven I heard mine missus say, “You’d besser haf some vine”-
Vell, dot’s der ding to settle id—und Schmertzer’s vos so fine.

Now scharge your glasses,” Christy said (mine vos made mit tin)
“I vont to told you sometings apoud mine daughter Min.”
Und so all vos listen, bur soon vos schmell a mouse,
For ve saw a schmiling couple gomen ofer fon der house.

“Mine daughter she vos married by der pastor soon as now,
So I vont you trink der health fon Gottleib und his frau,”
Und as dey schtepped into dot barn id vos a lofely sight,
Ve saw at Schmertzer’s barty on dot morning after night.

A birthday und a vedding, Schmenzer’s barty did for bote,
So der pastor und dot Schmertzer dis dime vos men of note;
For der pastor, he made two in von, und Schmertzer von in two,
He thought der birthday barty, vos do dot vedding too.